This surreal phrase chanted by 14-year-old schoolboys illustrates the gentle, oddball comedy of the story by TV playwright Jack Rosenthal. Alan (John Albasiny) has a crush on the prettiest girl in class (Abigail Cruttenden), but a host of obstacles are put in the way of his declaration of passion. Directed by Michael Apted, after Bill Forsyth's similar exploration of blackboard emotions in Gregory's Girl, it's a wry and highly comic look at teenage lust with some splendid performances, especially from Alison Steadman as a randy teacher.

Summer, 1948. 14-year-old Alan has just three wishes: that there will be lasting peace, that England will win the Ashes, and that he will finally kiss classmate Ann. So when he's cast opposite her in a play that requires a kiss and England seem to be doing well in cricket, life couldn't be better.